Beauty, even when learning about Agony

I just went through the Genocide Memorial Museum. I had been to the café there for a meeting, but today I had the chance to go through it in its entirety. I have so much to say about the Genocide Memorial Museum, but for now I just want to share something I saw there that was beautiful.

The part of the museum that most impressed me was walking through the memorial gardens. My favorite of the gardens was the "Garden of Division", which sits between the "Garden of Unity" and the "Garden of Reconciliation.

 Here is why I found it so powerful and meaningful:

Water flows out of the "Garden of Unity" and drops down a waterfall into the Garden of Division, which symbolizes the fall of Rwandan society.













The incoming water disrupts the tranquility of the otherwise tranquil pond in the center of the garden.







The pond has a spastic random shape to it, symbolizing the chaos that the genocide threw Rwanda into.










Several statues are positioned around the pond, each looking away from those around them, representing division.








Beautiful palm trees surround the pond, symbolizing the beauty of Rwanda despite the evil and chaos occurring within it.






Finally, the seating in this garden is all separate and individual, to emphasize the importance of taking personal responsibility for reflection. It was beautiful.

Over Before it Began... and then it Began Again!

I'm going to be candid here about why I am transitioning from a job in Rwanda to a new position in Rwanda.

I lived in Kenya for 6 months (2 years ago) and have been seeking another job in Africa (paid in USD) and in my field (I have a Master's degree in Public Health and Preventative Medicine) on and off since... I recently got out of a serious relationship and decided it was time to make it happen. So, I applied for (and landed) a 1-year job as a Program Manager for an organization in Rwanda that uses a sport for development model to promote gender equity through coed sports for youth. The organization is amazing, Rwandans are awesome, and the place was perfect... however, my boss: not so awesome. She flew over with me for the first 11 days here, but I was really sick the first week so I didn't exactly "shine". Then she decided that she wants someone with a lot of experience in "sport for development" (which is new to me, but I was excited about it). She said I was a great person and admitted that I had done nothing wrong, but said she thinks my background in Public Health is not going to be a good fit with her organization.

The weird thing is, she didn't think it was a big deal that I had packed up my life into 2 suitcases and planned on working really hard for her organization for a year (or at least a month, so she could see what I could do). She comes from a very wealthy family and it didn't occur to her that it would be a big deal to pull the rug out from under me like that. I never misrepresented myself. She knew all along that I had never worked in sport for development or had any specific training on it before this job opportunity. She says she didn’t realize how important it was until we got here.

So, after only 11 days (though I have been preparing for this for the past 3 months), my boss told me she was "letting me go" right before getting on a plane to go back to the US.  She later emailed me a to-do list from the plane, reminding me that she had already paid me through the end of January and owed her allegiance.

At first, I was devastated and thought I was in a terrible situation, but then I realized I am exactly where I want to be. I have an incomprehensible love for everything African. 

Nothing brings me more joy than giving high fives to little African children in rural villages and letting them play with my hair. If Peter Pan ever asks me what my “happy thought” is, that would be it. I’d be flying high with a little pixie dust! But I digress…

So, I decided to use some of my savings to stay longer and arranged to volunteer at a local preschool until I could land a paid job (again, preferably in Public Health with an international organization that could still pay me in USD).

To my pleasant surprise, the day after I got let go, I was contacted by an organization my friend had sent my resume to! It is an international org that empowers young women through a school-based program, which aims to prevent rape and domestic violence. It is an extension of a program called “No Means No Worldwide” (NMNWW) which is based in Kenya, but has recently started working in Malawi as well.

They have an amazing twice-annual training that starts this Monday (the 26^th) and they asked me to get there as soon as I could. I've booked a flight (I leave first thing tomorrow morning) and I agreed to a one-month trial to make sure I am a good fit for this org and this org is a good fit for me as well. The pay is $515/mo in USD, but the cost of living is much cheaper and what matters most to be is doing work I am passionate about. I'm nervous and excited!

When I told my former boss this, she asked me to pay her back some of the January living stipend money she had given me, as I would be departing Rwanda on the 24th (instead of her proposed date of the 27th). Yes, she is docking my pay (not pay, as it is not hourly, but docking my $1000 per month stipend amount) for the mere 3 days, despite the fact that I will continue to type up notes (from the training I received) to send to her during this time.

Woah- this is turning into a novel! Sorry so long! Many people have asked what happened & I didn't know what to say, so I have not said anything. And now, it's like I have verbal diarrhea or something! Ah! I'll wrap it up:

In sum: Rwanda is great, but the job didn't work out. I have this awesome opportunity to move to Malawi to work for a different NGO and I'm going for it! Wish me luck!

5 days in… my home life & my canine friends

Today is my 5^th day in Rwanda (4^th day in Gatagara) and I already love it here. I am living in a guest house owned by an American family with their own nonprofit org here (it is called City of Joy and it is a religious preschool). They are currently stateside, but they will return to Gatagara in early February. They are a family of 4: Todd, Andria, and their 2 young children (ages 1 and 3). Their house is a few doors down on the same gated-in compound.

The guest house is very impressive: it is much bigger than I had anticipated and I feel comfortable here. I just want to express my gratitude for having such a nice safe place to live. This enables me to focus on my work and ease my mom’s concerns (you know how mothers worry).

Todd and Andria have 2 “American-ized” dogs living on the compound. They warned me that the dogs may have become “wild” in their absence, but the dogs are very affectionate (I think they have missed Todd & Andria a lot). Before I came, Todd told me that Topie (the female dog) is more affectionate and friendly and Buddy (the male dog) is a little more skittish. Todd said Topie comes inside their house occasionally (and during every loud thunderstorm), but Buddy prefers to hang out on the porch (near people, but not quite as close to them).

Topie

 Topie n Buddy hanging out on my front porch

 Buddy

Surprisingly, Buddy has not been shy at all. In fact, he is quite gregarious. He is always wagging his tail and eager for me to scratch behind his ears. He does this cute thing where he steps in front of me and stretches (ironically, a downward dog position, with his front legs straightened, head down, and butt in the air) to signal he would like me to pet him. I don’t see Topie as often (one of her back legs has been hurting her), but she licks my hand and gently requests affection. Last night was the first time she laid on her back and had me scratch her belly. It is nice to know they trust me already.

There is a new puppy on the compound as well. Its name is Puppy (appropriately- LoL!) and it looks like a mini-Buddy. It lives at the pig farm downhill from the guest house, but it prefers to follow Buddy around everywhere he goes. Tracy says Buddy used to pick on Topie playfully, but now the puppy pushes him and nips at his hind legs (Karma, Tracy says.) The puppy is beautiful, but not well-behaved. It likes to jump up on people and it gently nips at your hands (luckily, he does this gently, but it can be annoying sometimes). The one command I would like to teach that puppy is “down” so my clothes don’t get so dirty.

My next door neighbor Belise is so sweet! She already showed me the printouts of the ingredients she requires to make her infamous pizza, and has offered to make it for me. I have offered to teach her some simple card games (which we will most likely play on the front porch or on the kitchen table). She is 25 (only a couple of years younger than me), which makes her great company. She speaks English quite well, but is eager to improve. Plus, she wears a Denver Broncos beanie/hat every day, which was a great sign, because I come from a family of hard-core Broncos football fans. 

Perhaps my biggest fear before coming here was loneliness. I prepared to spend a lot of time entertaining myself, but I don’t think that will be as much of an issue as I had anticipated. When I spoke on the phone with Todd, he made me feel so welcome to spend time with his family (which really means a lot to me, as I am very close with my own family).

Sending love to my family & friends stateside,

Stacy, Buddy, & Topie